By 7 years ago in Blogging SEO

Useless SEO bloggers who can’t even rank first for their own name

Dave is trying to rank for the term “Dave” on Google and I thought it would be interesting to see where all the other blogs I read ranked for their owners names on Google. Surprisingly most of them were nowhere to be seen but some had first page rankings and a couple even stole the top spot.


Patrick5th of 167,000,000 results (keywords not in title tag)

Dave2nd or 287,000,000 results (keyword in title tag)

Rand5th of 67,900,000 results (keyword in title tag)

Matt3rd out of 164,000,000 results (keywords in title tag)

Joost22nd out of just 6,260,000 results thanks to a TV station

Loren9th out of 13,800,000 results.

Jennifer7th out of 147,000,000 results.

Darren4th out of 28,200,000

Jeremy8th out of 64,400,000 results

Maki6th out of 1,590,000 results

Aaron3rd out of 72,600,000 results

Keemo3rd out of 96,100

Andy16th out of 137,000,000 results


Vanessa1st out of 49,400,000 results

Danny1st out of 76,600,000 results.

In a beautiful piece of irony both Larry & Sergey are pushed from the top spot by Wikipedia entries.

Where do you rank for your first name? Drop a link in the comments and I will add you to the list.

By Patrick Altoft. at 9:48PM on Monday, 17 Dec 2007

Patrick is the Director of Strategy at Branded3 and has spent the last 11 years working on the SEO strategies of some of the UK's largest brands. Patrick’s SEO knowledge and experience is highly regarded by many, and he’s regularly invited to speak at the world’s biggest search conferences and events. Follow Patrick Altoft on Twitter.


33 Responses to “Useless SEO bloggers who can’t even rank first for their own name”

  1. Jon Kelly says:

    I thought this was hilarious until I tried searching for my name.

    I gave up in digust on page 17 after I realized I’m behind Jon Secada.

  2. jeremy says:

    wow good thing i dont sell seo services… I fail =(

  3. Todd Mintz says:

    Wow, that’s harsh.

  4. Sucker says:

    I’m 13th for “Sucker”

    Pretty bad with only 19,800,000 results…

  5. Darren says:

    nice post – I used to rank #1 for Darren (and #3 for one of my other blogs) til Darren Hayes the singer made a comeback and Darren Shan released his book. Not the hardest name to rank well for though Smile

    I should also point out that you’re using rankings – they’re different on .com too and in more localized searches.

  6. Wicked Keemo says:

    Third! Should be better as it’s not exactly a popular name.

  7. Andy Beard says:

    Ok so I suck, 16th Andy, but ahead of Beal and Hagans (on

    Is in title tag, isn’t in H1

    .uk doesn’t seem to be as relevant ;) as none of the Andys of search seem to appear in the top100

    If I change the way I do my header I will probably get a boost as would a sitewide link give a boost.

    I seem to rank on everything better in the US than UK, maybe Google thinks the UK isn’t part of Europe ;)

  8. I used to rank #1 for my full name David Bradley, and then a load of imposters, such as the guy who plays Argus Filch in the Harry Potter films stole a march on my (courtesy of IMDB). I thought I’d try and redress the balance by writing a personal branding post and mentioning some of the other people called David Bradley, including the actor, murderer, chocolatier, and porn star.


  9. I’m not an SEO blogger so it doesn’t really count but I rank #2 for Fraser although I really don’t think I have much chance at taking the number 1 spot from House of Fraser!

    Great post though as I think we all probably keep an eye on these kind of vanity search positions.

  10. DAVE says:

    all i wanted was to say go to google type in dave and hit I feel lucky.. you’ll find me that way


  11. I rank #6 out of 18,500,000 for Debra. (name in title)

  12. I hate that TV station, more even because they pronounce Joost wrongly Smile (it’s yoast for you english people ;) )

  13. I rank #3, yo! Now I need to beat out Wikipedia ;) Help? ;)

  14. cha0s says:

    The only search were I rank #1 is Smile)
    It’s not so bad, isn’t it ?

  15. Banner_Man says:

    I’m 13th for “Sucker”- hehe ;P

  16. 2nd out of 37,400. Although, do I get bonus points for getting every hit on the first page but #1 and #8? Granted, I don’t rank currently for or, which I own both of, but that’s because I’ve been focusing on my main site at Need Coffee and not my name. So.

    And you wouldn’t think Widgett was much in use, but I’ve been pinged twice by people who have it for their last name asking if I’m a relative. Go figure.

  17. Guy McLaren says:

    I have a ranking of 181 internationally , but rank no 1 and 10 for a South African search. I guess I have some work to do huh. Guy Kawasaki is number 1.

  18. Mani Karthik says:

    Yaay ! I’ll include myself in the winners list. Smile

  19. iznan says:

    my name is iznan from malaysia. my site rank # 1 with keyword iznan

  20. Guy McLaren says:

    I am up to 63 for Guy. Now lets face it if my name was iznan, or Mohsin, It would be a lot bloody easier

  21. Guy McLaren says:

    476 000 000, just in case you are wondering.

  22. Regan says:

    I’m 2nd for Bullfrog Music

    And well in the depths for Regan. And seeing that 1st place went to this guy I’m very depressed now.

    “Regan was criticized for his Prime Ministerial style of working, for his involvement in the Iran-Contra Affair, and for his frequent disagreements with Ronald Reagan’s wife, First Lady Nancy Reagan”

  23. Chetan says:

    Searching for my name “Chetan” would give my blog in the top ;)

    Am i a good blogger then? ;)

  24. Guy McLaren says:

    11 of 599 000 000. I thought I would update you. Not bad for a farm boy from Africa?

  25. This post needs an update :) ranks #5 for [joost] :)

  26. Mike says:

    I dont think my name never reach 1st page.

  27. Ciaran says:

    10th at the moment, but I have been jumping around the 1st page

  28. Tino says:

    I rank #7.

    Please include me in the winners list! :)

  29. sriraj says:

    #1 for a search on the name ‘sriraj’
    Not a big deal though, not many ppl have my name

  30. Yaay ! I’ll include myself in the winners list.

  31. What do you think of pop-under exchanges? I’m having trouble getting visitors to my site,
    so I’m thinking about trying one. Are they effective?

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