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Useless SEO bloggers who can't even rank first for their own name

Dave is trying to rank for the term “Dave” on Google and I thought it would be interesting to see where all the other blogs I read ranked for their owners names on Google. Surprisingly most of them were nowhere to be seen but some had first page rankings and a couple even stole the top spot.

Losers

Patrick – 5th of 167,000,000 results (keywords not in title tag)

Dave – 2nd or 287,000,000 results (keyword in title tag)

Rand – 5th of 67,900,000 results (keyword in title tag)

Matt – 3rd out of 164,000,000 results (keywords in title tag)

Joost – 22nd out of just 6,260,000 results thanks to a TV station

Loren – 9th out of 13,800,000 results.

Jennifer – 7th out of 147,000,000 results.

Darren – 4th out of 28,200,000

Jeremy – 8th out of 64,400,000 results

Maki – 6th out of 1,590,000 results

Aaron – 3rd out of 72,600,000 results

Keemo – 3rd out of 96,100

Andy – 16th out of 137,000,000 results

Winners

Vanessa – 1st out of 49,400,000 results

Danny – 1st out of 76,600,000 results.

In a beautiful piece of irony both Larry & Sergey are pushed from the top spot by Wikipedia entries.

Where do you rank for your first name? Drop a link in the comments and I will add you to the list.

BY Patrick Altoft AT 9:48pm ON Monday, 17 December 2007

Patrick Altoft is Director of Search at Branded3 and has worked in the SEO industry for over 10 years. With experience across some of the worlds largest brands as well as startup businesses Patrick is well known in the industry and speaks regularly at the major SEO conferences and events. Follow Patrick on Twitter or Google+

Comments

  • http://blog.surehits.com Jon Kelly

    I thought this was hilarious until I tried searching for my name.

    I gave up in digust on page 17 after I realized I’m behind Jon Secada.

  • http://shoemoney.com jeremy

    wow good thing i dont sell seo services… I fail =(

  • http://srclarke.com Todd Mintz

    Wow, that’s harsh.

  • http://internetmarketingsucks.com Sucker

    I’m 13th for “Sucker”

    Pretty bad with only 19,800,000 results…

  • http://weedlady.laveda.info LaVeda Mason

    I place #8 on the first page:
    http://www.google.com/search?q=laveda

  • http://problogger.net Darren

    nice post – I used to rank #1 for Darren (and #3 for one of my other blogs) til Darren Hayes the singer made a comeback and Darren Shan released his book. Not the hardest name to rank well for though Smile

    I should also point out that you’re using .co.uk rankings – they’re different on .com too and in more localized searches.

  • http://makewickedmoney.com Wicked Keemo

    Third! Should be better as it’s not exactly a popular name.

    http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=keemo

  • http://andybeard.eu/ Andy Beard

    Ok so I suck, 16th Andy, but ahead of Beal and Hagans (on google.com)
    137,000,000

    Is in title tag, isn’t in H1

    .uk doesn’t seem to be as relevant ;) as none of the Andys of search seem to appear in the top100

    If I change the way I do my header I will probably get a boost as would a sitewide link give a boost.

    I seem to rank on everything better in the US than UK, maybe Google thinks the UK isn’t part of Europe ;)

  • http://sciencetext.com David Bradley

    I used to rank #1 for my full name David Bradley, and then a load of imposters, such as the guy who plays Argus Filch in the Harry Potter films stole a march on my (courtesy of IMDB). I thought I’d try and redress the balance by writing a personal branding post and mentioning some of the other people called David Bradley, including the actor, murderer, chocolatier, and porn star.

    db

  • http://affiliateblog.co.uk Fraser Edwards

    I’m not an SEO blogger so it doesn’t really count but I rank #2 for Fraser although I really don’t think I have much chance at taking the number 1 spot from House of Fraser!

    Great post though as I think we all probably keep an eye on these kind of vanity search positions.

  • http://davidnaylor.co.uk DAVE

    all i wanted was to say go to google type in dave and hit I feel lucky.. you’ll find me that way

    DaveN

  • http://alliance-link.com Debra Mastaler

    I rank #6 out of 18,500,000 for Debra. http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=Debra (name in title)

  • http://joostdevalk.nl/ Joost de Valk

    I hate that TV station, more even because they pronounce Joost wrongly Smile (it’s yoast for you english people ;) )

  • http://techipedia.com Tamar Weinberg

    I rank #3, yo! Now I need to beat out Wikipedia ;) Help? ;)

  • http://cha0sblog.de cha0s

    The only search were I rank #1 is site:cha0sblog.de Smile)
    It’s not so bad, isn’t it ?

  • http://24hbanner.com Banner_Man

    I’m 13th for “Sucker”- hehe ;P

  • http://needcoffee.com Widgett Walls

    2nd out of 37,400. Although, do I get bonus points for getting every hit on the first page but #1 and #8? Granted, I don’t rank currently for widgett.com or widgettwalls.com, which I own both of, but that’s because I’ve been focusing on my main site at Need Coffee and not my name. So.

    And you wouldn’t think Widgett was much in use, but I’ve been pinged twice by people who have it for their last name asking if I’m a relative. Go figure.

  • http://guymclaren.co.za Guy McLaren

    I have a ranking of 181 internationally , but rank no 1 and 10 for a South African search. I guess I have some work to do huh. Guy Kawasaki is number 1.

  • http://dailyseoblog.com Mani Karthik

    Yaay ! I’ll include myself in the winners list. Smile

  • http://bloggingbits.com Mohsin

    I rank #5 for my first name: http://www.google.com.pk/search?q=mohsin

  • http://iznan.com iznan

    my name is iznan from malaysia. my site rank # 1 with keyword iznan

  • http://guymclaren.co.za Guy McLaren

    I am up to 63 for Guy. Now lets face it if my name was iznan, or Mohsin, It would be a lot bloody easier

  • http://guymclaren.co.za Guy McLaren

    476 000 000, just in case you are wondering.

  • http://bullfrogmusic.ca/ Regan

    I’m 2nd for Bullfrog Music
    http://www.google.ca/search?hl=en&q=bullfrog+music&btnG=Search&meta=

    And well in the depths for Regan. And seeing that 1st place went to this guy I’m very depressed now.

    “Regan was criticized for his Prime Ministerial style of working, for his involvement in the Iran-Contra Affair, and for his frequent disagreements with Ronald Reagan’s wife, First Lady Nancy Reagan”

  • http://www.thewwwblog.com/ Chetan

    Searching for my name “Chetan” would give my blog drchetan.com in the top ;)

    Am i a good blogger then? ;)

  • http://guymclaren.co.za Guy McLaren

    11 of 599 000 000. I thought I would update you. Not bad for a farm boy from Africa?

  • http://yoast.com Joost de Valk

    This post needs an update :) yoast.com ranks #5 for [joost] :)

  • http://seosoeasy.com Mike

    I dont think my name never reach 1st page.

  • http://ciarannorris.co.uk Ciaran

    10th at the moment, but I have been jumping around the 1st page

    http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=ciaran&pws=0&hl=en&num=10

  • http://the16art.com Tino

    I rank #7.

    Please include me in the winners list! :)

  • http://www.sriraj.org sriraj

    #1 for a search on the name ‘sriraj’
    Not a big deal though, not many ppl have my name

  • http://saranr.com SaranR Wordpress SEO

    Yaay ! I’ll include myself in the winners list.

  • http://pamanojseo.wordpress.com seo in chennai

    What do you think of pop-under exchanges? I’m having trouble getting visitors to my site,
    so I’m thinking about trying one. Are they effective?

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