The 34 funniest search queries so far

  • 0
  • September 27, 2007
Patrick Altoft

Patrick Altoft

Director of Strategy

10,000 lucky people have found BlogStorm via search engines in the last 3 months, not all of the search terms were what you might expect from an internet marketing blog and some were just too funny.

If you want to see what I blogged about to rank for these strange queries click here to read all 200 posts.

Here are the pick of the bunch:

“human powered search market”

“mahalo fail”

Jason, is that you?

john chow + matt cutts

Best friends forever.

10,000 one way links

Wow. Let me know when you find them.

“sphinn vs digg”

I don’t think you’re quite there yet Danny.

“lets have sex”

Not tonight, thanks for the offer.

“ebay stolen”

Really? Who took it?

“how to have internet sex”

Maybe in a few years time.

“what is the use google”

John Chow is that you?

“wikipedia facebook”

SEO nightmare?

“buying stolen caravans”

Not really recommended…

“caravan stolen what to do”

Buy it back on ebay.

“cookie stuffing +affiliates +wikipedia”

Pretty sure the Wikipedia editors won’t like that.

“get sued for linkbuilding”

Not gonna happen.

“google hack porn pictures”

What ever floats your boat. Try MSN hack porn as well.

“how to make money from reading books”

“making money by reading ads”

Not going to make you rich very quickly. The guy who searched for information on how to “make money from paper” is at least on the right track.

“how to take the picture of my penis”

“normal people penis photo”


“google sell links $2000”

If they pass PR please let me know. Don’t tell Matt though.

“gay cruising in the uk”

“free homemade dog food recipes”

“ferret tracking device”

“famous people penis pictures”

Pretty sure BlogStorm didn’t answer these queries.

“make £10,000 in 3 days”

“make £50,000 in two weeks”

Just what I like to see. A long term strategy.

“why people take pictures”

Not sure. Maybe to preserve the moment?

“john chow” slap

John isn’t to everyones taste but that’s a bit harsh.

“perez hilton” nude pics

Most people prefer Paris but each to their own.

“are .biz domains any good for a google consultant”

Not really. Its all about branding you see.

“1 billion email addresses”

Give me your email address and $10 and I’ll send them over.

“can you take pic with webcams”


“do people really read blogs”

Not sure. You tell me.

Thanks to John from Silvelox wooden garage doors for the idea.

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